Friday, September 7, 2012

Raw - No Edits

Our life has been crazy lately.  Words will not begin to describe it.  I have been wanting to write on this and my other blog for weeks, and life has been so chaotic there has been not even a moment to think of what to write.

We have been living on faith, hope, and the literal charity of others.

Our decisions have been based on humility and trust.  We have no idea what we're doing, besides that we're trusting in the minimal inspiration we feel we have received.

We are nearly penniless, but are living at the mercy of loving family members, and legal promises made from documents signed years ago.  I should correct myself.  We are living at the sheer mercy of God.

We are scrounging up hope where there is very little.  So often people in a tough situation are just going through the motions.  I know God requires more, but sometimes, we are in positions where we hang by a thread.  My hope is about the size of that thread, but even threads are strong.  Without them, there is no rope.

I have no point to this post, besides to say that I'm tired.  Nearly every nightly prayer begins with "I feel so tired."  This "major shift" has been in the works for many months now, and we trust that in the end things will work out.  For now, I'm burning the candle at 5 ends, not just 2.  Perhaps my prayers should be more faithful, rather than hopeless.

Anyways... perhaps this appears a bit raw, but sometimes I think we need to put out there how we feel so that when we're back up high on the mountain, we can see where we once stood.  God willing.

Many thanks to my friends who pray for us.  I am thankful for the words of Chrissy: "I hold you high to the Father."  I love that.  Gives me joy.

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