Sunday, April 28, 2013

Spirit Sensitivity

Dear Daniel,

I'm DONE!!!  Today I took my final examination required to become a massage therapist.  When I began this blog over a year and a half ago (?), I never expected that this "major shift" would turn me into a massage therapist!  But here we are, and I'm almost done.  In a few days you'll have your mommy completely home again, and we can make as many messes as we want.

(Thank you for the beautiful flowers! xoxo!)

I've missed getting to spend my days with you and Austin.  Sure, the older ones were at school all day, and mostly I'd be here for them.  I hope you and your siblings weren't traumatized by hanging out with your pappy and daddy half the days.  I know lots of people do that situation, where the mom just isn't able to be in the home.  But this decision felt hard for me, despite its rightness, because it didn't make sense in so many ways.  I remember worrying to one of my classmates, saying those exact "I hope my boys aren't traumatized" words.  She said to me, "They'll be just fine!"  Hopefully time proves her right. You seem to be just fine.

There's a magical discovery that happened during these months of school.  There is a power in our bodies that few of us realize, and it is the power of one's spirit.  Generally we neglect, and many even deny, that such a thing is there.  But when we die, it is our ever-living spirit which carries on, while our bodies return to the ground from whence we are told they came.  In practicing massage, I have learned to greater feel my own spirit, and the literal impact it can have on the spirits of others.

I remember several years ago, not quite understanding why my own spirit seemed so unique.  Some situations bothered me more than they would bother the average person.  WaWa always said that I needed to "toughen up" my skin, and not be so sensitive.  At times she's right, but I'm observing that it is my sensitive skin that is in fact a gift.  I don't need to necessarily please other people, or worry about holding up my pride.  It doesn't matter if I'm the only one to ever apologize for doing something wrong, while the other party feels their pride in "being right".  It'll work itself out.  I trust that being sensitive and impacted by the spirits and energies of others is part of who I am, and part of the gifts that God has given me.

Perhaps this might not be that insightful for you, and perhaps it will be.  Some people take offense at things that should not be taken offense at, and it will be up to you to forgive them, and not let their negative spirits cut into your beautiful, sensitive spirit.  You seem to be as easily affected by others' energies as I am, so will warn you that this can hurt, when you are unprepared.  But get prepared.  Take care of your body, and show it respect, so that you appreciate and protect the gift that is inherent in you, as it is in me.

You are my sunshine...
I'm so glad I get to spend more time with you.  It is the biggest relief, to know that I can now be home with you each and every day if I want to.  I hope that with accomplishing this remarkable goal, it will bless your life as you grow.  It certainly has awakened a power I never knew existed.


1 comment:

  1. A little confused...Austin and Daniel???? lol I wish so much I could be home again. My life is in such disarray right now.


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